What should a Christian man prioritize in his twenties?
I really started to give my life to Christ when I was 18 years old. I had no plan for life. When I was 16, a teacher pulled me out of class and asked, where do you see yourself when you are 21? I responded, I will either be in prison or I will be dead. That was the type of existence I lived. So when I was 18, I had little or no strategy, plan, or guidance on how to live life or become a man.
But when I found Christ, I realized there was someone to embrace. These are the principles you want to start living out in your 20s, in this order. Number one: a relationship with God. This is your primary purpose and reason for existence for the rest of your life. If you want to be a godly man, you have to have a godly relationship with Christ. That does not simply mean avoiding sins.
Avoiding sins is a small part of being a Christian. The big part is investing your time and energy into Christ and his church: going to services, going to confession regularly, receiving the Eucharist as frequently as possible, praying in the morning and in the evening, fasting on fasting days, becoming immersed in seeking after Christ so that he would instill in you the power of the Holy Spirit.
How we have our relationship with God is going to determine how we have our relationship with everyone and everything else. If someone asked me the number one place to put your time and energy, I would tell them: God. That is it. In your 20s you have the uniqueness of not having a wife or children. You have loads of time on your hands, and that time is very precious.
That does not mean you have to be neurotic and map out every single minute of your day. You can have small bits of rejuvenation, something you enjoy, a hobby. But the primary work of the day should be committed to guarding our thoughts, saying the Jesus prayer, following after Christ. Our relationship with Christ is the foundation of all that it means to be a man, because it is the power of the Holy Spirit living within us.
Practically: when you are driving, cut off the noise, the music, the songs that get stuck in your head. Leave that time for saying the Jesus prayer, or for reflecting on the things of the day, thinking about things that are beneficial, not having imaginary conversations with people who are not there. Do not spend three to five hours on video games. Maybe you spend an hour after you finish homework or college, even an hour and a half, to cut loose and take your brain off things.
That is fine, but it cannot be that last window of time before you go to bed. That time needs to be devoted to reading the lives of the saints, reading the holy scriptures, and doing your evening prayers. So many people think the Christian life is reactive, about not committing sins. The reality is that it is proactive, building a healthy, robust relationship with Christ in all the practical aspects of your life.
Some people say, if I am not doing everything spiritual, it is not worth doing anything at all. Those people are doomed to fail. You have to have some balance. But it is not a crazy ask to do 20 to 30 minutes of prayer in the morning, 20 to 30 minutes of prayer in the evening, and 30 minutes to an hour of reading every day, especially when you are in your 20s with no wife, no kids, and minimal responsibilities. Invest your time wisely.
