Why do I fall apart spiritually when life gets hard?

"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water." "Come," he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water, and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me." So what did Peter see? He saw the whipping of the wind. He was not focused on Christ. He was focused on what was happening around him.

In his case, the wind was actual wind. In our life, the wind is a metaphor for whatever is assailing us: losing our job, not having enough money in our bank account, a problem at work, a problem with our health. When the wind happens and we turn the eyes of our soul, not our physical eyes but the noetic eyes of our soul, we begin to take our heart off of Christ. When we do that, we begin to sink.